Honestly, when I check my messages, I mostly skip the journal parts. Could be because of my lack of time and/or willingness. Who knows.
Do people even still know me? Maybe two or three of you do, but most people probably have forgotten me, which isn't bad. It's my fault after all for only sending life signs just once in year or so.
So still, why do I even bother writing this? Maybe just to get things off my chest. I tend to do that when my brain is stuffed with thoughts and activity. Like it is now.
I also tend to do these way too long. Maybe not today. We'll see.
So, what's new? Fun part is, there is nothing new. Going into my fourth year of college now, and things COULD run more smootly. I had to repeat some classes and lectures and it's quite a pain in the ass to do all that stuff again. Since my college is strongly divided by summer- and winter semesters, I can only repeat summer classes in summer and winter classes in winter - unfortunately. So waiting a whole year just because I was "lazy" sucks balls. What else? No job at the moment. Actually since middle of march. I can remember doing nothing but studying and working, weeks or months long. On the few short days I have off, I mostly visited family or friends. So now, I'm unemployed. For the first time in 4 years. Yay. Affording to go to college is not a big deal. I saved a lot of money during these times. So basically, apart from studying, I now hae more time for me. Time to actually think about me and my future. Time to do my hobbies I mostly had to quit because of named schedule. I became quite a pro in computer science if I do say so myself, but to gain that, I lost all of my other abilities. Until now. I just recently started playing video games again. Of course, what else, it's an MMORPG again. My favorite genre. I also started learning japanese as a side course in college, and I also started practising kendo. You could say I became a japanese freak lol. I don't why or how that happened. It's not like I watch animes all night long. I just recently picked up a huge interest in the country itself, maybe due to what kind of technology they are able to produce. Anyways, now I picked up some old habits again, and started a competely new hobby. So tonight, I was sitting here, at my pc, wondering what else there was I enjoyed doing in the past. Then I spied deviantART in my bookmarks.
So after gazing on my on profile, which has become nothing but a pile of trash in the last years, I just decided to pick it up again aswell. Not only dA as a community, but also the art thing. I once loved drawing, even if my pieces where far beyond being called "good". I enjoyed doing it back then, and that has been all that mattered to me. I had quite some "artist crises" too, if I recall correctly. Stupid things like "ohh, I'm no good as an artist, I'll quit meh meh" were bothering me because I literally had nothing better to do back then. If I had to name one thing that was absolutely positive during college, I'd say it's how it has affected the way I'm thinking and doing things. I became more modest, more serious in a manner of wild thinking, I gained a bit of discipline, and in gerenal I'd say I'm more mature now. I still have some "silly phases", but not in weird situations anymore like I used to.
So with these new traits, I'm picking up the pencil once again. So, since upcoming art is probably taking a while (since I just have to start all over again), expect more journals, comments, and activity in the community in general of me instead. This whole process from my first drawings over refurbishing my profile page up to uploading some pieces will proceed steady, but definite. I hope to get in touch with you guys again, who still now me. And I'm also looking forward in meeting new people aswell!
Until next time, stay tuned! And If you have questions or just want to talk, there's a big commentary section underneath